Book Group Discussion Guide for “Memory Lake: The Forever Friendships of Summer”

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Book Groups, Discussion Guide, Memory Lake, Questions for Discussion

The following questions are designed to stimulate a book group discussion after reading “Memory Lake: The Forever Friendships of Summer.”

Now you’ve read it…. what did you think?

The working title of Memory Lake was originally Sacrifices of Joy.  The author’s publisher changed the title because in their professional view, “Sacrifices are for witches and Joy is for cooking and sex.”  What does a ‘sacrifice of joy’ mean to you? Can you identify it as a recurring theme in the novel, and as a tool for overcoming grief and hardship?

Identify pivotal times in your life in which you forced yourself to express joy when you least felt like it.  Did this attitude help you to persevere and achieve an accomplishment of which you are particularly proud?

Did you attend summer camp?  Discuss your own summer camp experience, if you had one.

If you were homesick, did you attend camp too young?  Was the camp you attended flawed in some way?

The author and her cousins at Lake St. Helen in 1965.

If you had a favorable camp experience, in what ways was your camp similar or dissimilar to the author’s?  As a camper did you see improvement in any of these areas:

• An expanded imagination
• Character development
• Sacred dimensions
• Independence and self-esteem
• Friendships and social skills
• Making a connection to the outdoors
• Leadership training
  

  Team building at the Leelanau Outdoor Center

As an adolescent, were you influenced negatively by peer pressure?  Could you have benefited from a summer camp experience?  Do you think kids today need to escape negative peer pressure more than kids from earlier generations?

The author believes children benefit greatly by unplugging from their electronic devices and establishing a connection to nature even if they are unable to attend summer camp.  What lessons did the characters of Memory Lake learn from their outdoor experiences?  Could these same lessons have been learned indoors?

Unplugging at the Leelanau Outdoor Center

Do you experience a sense of awe and well-being when surrounded by natural beauty? Many believe this sensation can lead to spiritual awareness and an inner confidence.  Is there a place of natural beauty that is important to you, where you feel especially connected to a sacred presence?

Discuss the pivotal role Lake Michigan played in the story and in the main characters’ development.  To what degree do you think the lake influenced the campers’ overall experience?  Were the bonds of friendship more or less important than the setting?   Do you think the characters’ camp experiences would have been the same in a different setting?

Lake Michigan; chilly but beautiful…

Have you ever visited the Sleeping Bear Dunes?  Check out this National Park Service link to learn more about its natural beauty:  https://www.nps.gov/slbe/index.htm

Sleeping Bear Dunes

What defines a ‘forever friend’ to you?  Have you recently reconnected with individuals who were once your closest friends?  Were you able to rekindle the same level of association?

Have the friendships in your life helped or hindered your spiritual growth? Do you think a more spiritual connection to a friend increases the chances of that friendship’s longevity?

Which characters in Memory Lake do you identify with the most, and why?

Tori, Lori, Nancy, Susie, Cindy, Christie, Sarah, author, and Mary

Did Nanny’s personality resonate with you?  Have there been fears and limitations passed on through generations of women in your family?  Have you, or your mother been able to break free?  If so, how was this accomplished?  If you have a daughter, have you tried not to pass on certain traits to her?

Nancy Roman and David were married after publication: on the grounds of the old camp.

Most sleep-away summer camps, whether affiliated with a specific faith or not, imbue sacred elements into the overall camp experience to teach empathy, kindness, cooperation and other positive qualities.  Do you think today’s women and girls need an honor code to live by?  Discuss how the various camper qualities and the earning of beads helped the campers get along without jealousy or arguing.

If you were able to establish a code for women and girls to live by, what would it be?

After reading Memory Lake, are you more inclined to recommend summer camp to your own children or grandchildren?

Dr. Michael Thompson, a leading child and family psychologist and New York Times best-selling author says, “Camp ushers kids into a thrilling world of emotionally significant experiences that are theirs alone – ones they can only get when away from home.  Parents’ first instinct to shelter their offspring above all else – can actually deprive kids of the major developmental milestones and independent learning that occurs through letting them go.”  Would you have agreed with this statement before reading Memory Lake? Are you more inclined to agree with this statement now, after having read Memory Lake?

Experiencing nature at the Leelanau Outdoor Center.

Author’s daughter and granddaughter

The author would like to hear from you!  Please leave a comment pertaining to your book group’s experience in discussing Memory Lake.

A Memory of Mom on Mothers Day

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Bazooka, bubble gum, Memory Lake, Mothers Day, Tribute

My earliest memory of Mom is tied to laughter. It was 1961, I was two, we lived in a new house, in a new neighborhood, and a new young president ran the country.  Mom sat on the herringbone sofa, propped her loafers on the low blond coffee table, and placed two hard squares of Bazooka bubblegum in her mouth.

Mom posing for a rare photo without her glasses…

She rarely relaxed, so my older sister  and I immediately gathered beside her. Her first few bubbles grew to the size of quarters, popped quickly, and only stuck briefly to her lips. Now we had the idea and smiled as the next one popped near her nose. She slowly and methodically peeled the gum away and returned it to her mouth. She chewed with her lips together and maneuvered her hidden tongue to attain the gum’s proper shape. We fiendishly anticipated the pink bubble’s tiny emergence from her bright red lipstick mouth. We barely breathed as it grew. We began to giggle as it increasingly thinned. We screamed when it popped.  

She did it over and over again, at our insistence.  Each bubble grew larger than the last and each grew dangerously close to her black horn-rimmed glasses. We wondered if she would dare allow the pink, sticky gum to touch the glasses she always wore, so desperately needed, and never allowed us to touch.  When a bubble grew bigger than her head, we knew this would be the one.

Mom and her glasses…

When it popped, it plastered a pink mass of stickiness over her cheeks, forehead, and the glasses.  She barely cracked a smile.  I curled into a ball next to her and hugged my stomach because I was giggling so hard my sides hurt.  I alternately laughed then returned my disbelieving eyes to her mess.  She just sat there covered in pink goo. After a while, she simply peeled the strings of gum away without removing her glasses, or saying a word, which made me laugh all the more.  

From that moment on, I tried to blow bubbles like her, but the gum just flew from my mouth in a stream of spit.  It took years of practice and I eventually mastered it, but to this day, every time I blow a bubble, or see someone blowing a bubble, I recall his memory.  Surely, this is why it remains so vivid today.  But, there is another reason.  That day was the day my mom became more than just our caretaker.  As each bubble grew, she grew in my estimation to a mysterious individual separate from me, full of hidden talents and a quiet dignity.

Going after those glasses before I knew better…

From that day on, I had wanted to be just like her.  And no one has, or ever will, take that place.

This was my guest post on Linda Johnston’s blog.  (Linda has authored an important collection from the Kansas Territories; Hope Amid Hardship: Pioneer Voices from Kansas Territory)

The Legend of Sleeping Bear Dunes

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Dapine, Great Spirit, Lake Michigan, Made in Michigan, Manitou Island, Memory Lake, Michigan, North Manitou Island, Second Edition, Sleeping Bear Dunes, Sleeping Bear Dunes National Lakeshore, Tate Publishing, The Legend of Sleeping Bear, Wisconsin

George Vieira’s interpretation of the old legend is well-written and faithfully crafted.  He has graciously allowed me to re-post it.  The dunes play a key role in “Memory Lake; The Forever Friendships of Summer.”  Tate Publishing is launching the Second Edition this month and the new cover is a view of Lake Michigan from the top of the dunes. You can see it on their website:   http://www.tatepublishing.com/bookstore/book.php?w=978-1-62746-240-2

Please read George’s blog post below, or visit his page:   http://mishigamaa.wordpress.com/2013/08/10/the-legend-of-sleeping-bear/

The Legend of Sleeping Bear

Posted on August 10, 2013 by George Vieira

The wind breathes a song of ancient wisdom – only listen to the rattle of the ghost forest up on the dunes. It’s the story of Dapine, mother bear, proud parent of sharp claws and soft fur. Her cubs dancing on rolling Wisconsin plains, two brothers in the summer sun, animated by a boundless spirit. A bond unbreakable, unbelievable, takes us back to that terrible month when the sun hung too close to the Earth for too long.

Day after day, the leaves curled and the grass progressively turned orange. The forest was brittle and dangerous. Then one night lightning struck and set a dry patch ablaze. As luck would have it a fierce wind howled and blew the flames higher and farther, until the flames towered over the forest animals. Instinctively, Dapine ran for Lake Michigan, that immortal body, her cubs racing behind her, tripping over their young, clumsy paws. Though safe in the calm, placid waters of the lake, she saw in the thick black smoke the desolation and starvation that awaited her cubs once the fire died. Where they’d rolled and played and sweet honeycombs had bounded, charred nothingness would smolder.

So Dapine swam, desperate, one stroke at a time, towards Michigan. The journey was long and difficult, and the young cubs struggled to keep up, panting, tongues agog. On the second night of their journey, a great storm whipped the lake into a panicked frenzy. Hail pelted their thick coats; lightning made their fur stand on end. And somewhere in the wild waves she lost her cubs, their panicked faces illuminated by one last flash of light before being enveloped in permanent darkness.

Dapine swam against the tide for many hours in search of her cubs. She cried out their names, desperate, painful screams full of sorrow. But no answer. Exhausted, she turned back the following morning for the northwest shore of Michigan. Drenched and tired, she finally pawed her way onto the promised beach. At last. The sky was deep and blue, the green expanse of trees swayed in the wind. There was food, shelter, and water.

But no cubs.

All Dapine could think of was her cubs. She felt little relief or happiness in having made it alive to Michigan. Day and night, she faithfully watched the endless waves hoping to catch a glimpse of her lost cubs. In her many, fevered dreams, there they were, safe and warm in the old den, gnawing on the fish bones held between their tiny claws. She quickly grew wane and emaciated, her hair falling out in tufts on the soft sand.

Seeing Dapine, the Great Spirit was moved to tears by her story, from the veil of impartial observation to utmost mercy. As the earth shook and a hard rain fell, he raised two large landmasses above the waters of Lake Michigan in remembrance of Dapine’s cubs, North Manitou Island and South Manitou Island. He imbued the islands with their innocent energy, so that it would be a grand memorial to Dapine’s loss. She saw this, and like animals always do, knew right away what it meant.

And so with heavy sigh, Dapine closed her eyes and slept by the waves. It was then she felt a sudden lightness, her soul hovering over her own body. Carried by the force of the Great Spirit, she ascended up beyond the worries of the world, where in the limitless sky her cubs hopped from cloud to cloud in excitement, reunited with their mother at last.

Back down on earth, Dapine’s body turned to sand, more and more sand. In her place a great dune emerged, which from the Manitou Islands resembled a giant sleeping bear. The Great Spirit did this as a testament to the power of love, the story of Dapine and her cubs. Even today, the area is called the Sleeping Bear Dunes, and the story is written of on plaques and in books, never forgotten.

Kyme vs. Schmidty; or, “Why I left IU’s Kelley School of Business”

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accounting, Bloomington Indiana, California, Delta Tau Delta, Indiana University, Kelley School of Business, linguistics, Memory Lake, navigator, Newton, Perdido Key, ROTC, Wall Street Journal

Ever since my camp friend, (the other Nancy!) turned my maiden name, Schmidt, into Schmidty, over thirty years ago, the name has stuck.  After my last summer at camp, I met a chemistry major, Kyme, at a Delta Tau Delta party in Bloomington, IN.  His black curly hair was shorter than most, (though still long by today’s standards).  His perfect posture placed him a head above the crowd, and his manners made him seem older. His bearing drew me toward him like a port in a storm.  Call it love at first sight, a soul finding its destiny, or the force of angels, but before I could question it, I was introducing myself to him.  Later that evening, I learned he was attending Indiana University on an Air Force ROTC scholarship.

Searching for a firm place to walk….

I have always felt the pull of two warring personalities.  Who hasn’t, at some point or other?  (It’s a common thread running through “Memory Lake“.)  I suspect many of you have settled down by now, but being an ambidextrous Gemini, I still feel the pull.  I thrive on the struggle and Kyme helps me find the middle.

At that Delta Tau Delta party, Kyme was a junior and I was a freshman, a young freshman, since I’d graduated high school at sixteen, (turning seventeen days later).  He lived with three clearly focused, intelligent, and brutally honest roommates.  All of them, Kyme especially, challenged me to find my middle.  Opinions needed to be well articulated and backed by facts because nearly every discussion turned into a debate.  Since facts could not be had at the flick of a finger, some debates never ended.  Others turned on the last, best liar.  Craving gravitas, I left the field of linguistics for the Kelley School of Business, and chose accounting as a major.  I subscribed to the Wall Street Journal.  I began following politics.  When they graduated after my sophomore year, despite the great company of my fun, elegant roommate, (Janet of Newton, MA), I missed them.  I missed Kyme.

Kyme at Perdido Key Florida, waiting for me….

He had headed off to California for navigator training.  My mom said, “He is starting a new life without you.  You can finish your degree anywhere.”  Therefore, at the end of my junior year, after passing both semesters of Intermediate Accounting, the weeding out course which sent many students to finance or marketing, I married Kyme.  He really wanted me to have that degree from IU’s Kelley School of Business, and would have waited, but my warring personalities would have drowned in a large corporation, which is where that degree would have landed me. Besides, California sounded way more fun.

I am frequently amazed by all I have accomplished at Kyme’s side over three decades.  He is that steady beach walker who takes the high ground and steers clear of erratic waves and uneven footing.  He plods parallel to shore, walking on firm sand, aiming unwavering for his navigated target.  I dodge the waves, laughing at every near miss, following a zigzag path, usually running to catch up to him.  If I fall behind, he waits.  If I’m about to walk into a fishing line, his deep voice calls, “Schmidty”.  When I take Kyme’s hand, I can walk in the middle with my eyes on the sparkling water and the great, vast horizon beyond, confident in my footing.

Thank you to thousands of readers!

Tags

Amazon Kindle, Barnes & Noble, Book, E-book, IPad, Kindle Store, Memory Lake, Nook, sales, Shopping, statistics, Thank you, writing

I am warmed and humbled by readers who have taken a chance on Memory Lake.  Thank you for spreading the word, for purchasing a paperback or e-book, for borrowing it from your library, or lending it to a friend.

Some statistics:  “411,422 books were published in the U.S. in 2007.  1,052,803 books were published in the U.S. 2009.  Approximately 3,000,000 books were published in the U.S. in 2011.*   Titles for 2012 will probably exceed 15 million.  Almost 80% of these titles sold fewer than 100 copies. **

“Books-a-Million” display

Admittedly, promotion has been tough.  But, I’m not in it for the money.  I’m in it for the message.  I believe in Memory Lake.  Thank you for believing in it as well, because paperback sales alone surpassed 1,000 copies at summer’s end, and continue. 

Memory Lake took seven years of my life to write and edit.  Every word was carefully chosen and later verified by Harvard and Notre Dame PhD’s.  The novel’s message was officially stamped ‘Inspirational’ by Next Generation Indie Award judges in June.  Each morning of those seven years of writing, before turning on my computer, I would pray, “Lord, let me do thy will. Let me be a vessel for your message.”  (Yes, I really do use ‘thy’ when praying because I love the classics, and no, I am not a preacher.)  I simply set out to tell an uplifting story, amid so many to the contrary, and to clarify those life lessons which I needed to relearn.  I took a chance that many of you needed to relearn them too, though not through a boring biography, or self-help textbook, but through a novel’s highly descriptive immersion into youth; into a time when we knew these truths most effortlessly.

As one reader wrote, “Certainly overcoming fear is not a new concept, but it bears repeating and you have done so quite beautifully. Thank you for reminding me of this at a time when I need to remember it most.”   No, thank you dear readers for reminding me at a time when I need it most.  Promotion for Memory Lake will continue in 2013 because you have reminded me it is worth promoting.

A lovely sight to see on September 16, 2012 (Memory Lake’s Amazon Kindle ranking):

• Amazon Best Sellers Rank: #121,021 Paid in Kindle Store  (See  Top 100 Paid in Kindle Store)
  • #80 in Kindle  Store > Kindle  eBooks > Nonfiction > Advice & How-to > Parenting & Families > Parenting > Teenagers

Source blogs:

*  http://ptbertram.wordpress.com/2012/04/17/how-many-books-are-going-to-be-published-in-2012-prepare-for-a-shock/

**  http://www.fool.com/investing/general/2011/10/14/amazon-gets-back-to-its-roots.aspx#.UFSqNY1lSuQ